In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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