If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
