did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize