She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
