He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
