so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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