i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
