i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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