tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
