Are we in a gay sports bar?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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