Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Ladies don't puke and tell
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
