I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
