youre lurking in front of me
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
