oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
