I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
