but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today