i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
