I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize