My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
