Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
