Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize