Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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