So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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