A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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