Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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