You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
