Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Someone shit on the floor
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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