Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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