Im at strip club and am horny
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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