i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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