I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
tell me about the eggs
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
