GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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