i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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