Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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