they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
