Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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