You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
