the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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