I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I think I just sharted jello shots
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