Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
