Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize