let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
