I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Randomize
