my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
