whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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