he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
