You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
