I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
