Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
