every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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