when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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